I’m not going to lie, I’ve been dreading this day.
I knew this day was going to bring up emotions that I was trying to get away from. Even though I faced the heartache I’ve been feeling again, I was able to have a day full of love and lots of tears. But after sitting in the Mother’s Day sermon at church, there were a few things I realized.
First: Strength does not come from an absence of tears. I was often told when I was younger that I was too emotional and this world was going to crush me if I didn’t harden up. The older I get the more I realize that tears are not a sign of weakness. This is how the Lord made me. He made me emotional and raw. I’m honest with how I’m feeling and sometimes I am just sad. Just because I cry does not mean the Lord has not given me strength.
He has given me strength through never losing faith. My faith has not been shaken through this experience. It has become stronger than ever before. That is true strength. That is the strength that can only come from Jesus.
Second: Being a Mother is serving the Lord. I may not have a baby on this earth right now. My baby is in heaven but while I’m here it is my duty to serve Jesus. I can start serving Jesus as a mother right now. I will serve Him by being a faithful wife to my husband. I will prepare our household for babies now. I will begin the example that I believe our children need, right now. There will be no adjustment in my character when my children arrive. I am going to set that example in this very moment. The most important part of that is serving the Lord Jesus, making Him the root of every single thing in my life, in my family’s life, and in every single thing I do. I need Him to be the foundation for our household and our marriage. We begin this not when we get a positive pregnancy test, but right now.
Third: My hands may be empty but my heart is full. There is no love like Jesus. He is love. He brings love. He showers us every single day with all the love that is inside Him BUT we need to embrace it. I could sit and cry every day because my heart aches so bad but how could I serve the Lord and spread His love if I am focused on the pain? When we look away from our pain and despair and look up to Jesus, we feel peace and our hearts can finally be at rest. Just the other day I cried to my husband and asked why certain doors were not opening up for me right now. Haven’t we had enough hurt now? When is Jesus going to come through? Well, I needed to look up. These answers are not for me to find. The answer is simple, and the answer is Jesus. He is the only thing I need to focus on right now. Him. His goodness. His mercy. His love. It fills me and makes me whole.
I’m praying you had a wonderful Mother’s Day. If you’re a momma I pray you were able to soak in all the love you could from your family. If you’re desperate to be a momma I pray the Lord gives you peace, and that you would begin being the momma the Lord wants you to be right now. Let us serve Him in all things.